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| What's that? I sense a newly single sure-thing! |
It will be months without any communication. No texting. No emailing. No late night phone calls. No hand-written love letters. (Ha, that was a joke!) Nothing!
During those said months I will become interested in someone else. This generally goes poorly and a few months later I am again single. Queue the blast from the past.
Text: "Hey there....Just wanted to say hi and see what's new?"
Possible Translation: So, like you, I have been dating someone for the last couple months. Man, the sex was great! But, she wanted more than I am able to provide emotionally and now she won't return my calls. If you don't still hate me, would you be game for a commitments-free roll in the hay?
Email: "I just had a crazy dream about you (nothing bad, I swear) and I can't stop thinking about it. It would be great to hear from you!"
Possible Translation: You know that thing you used to do? Yeah, I think about it all the time. And, I really, really tried to get my newest lady friend to do it...But, it just wasn't the same. Fancy a trip down memory lane? Are you still that flexible...I mean, when are you perhaps available?
Voice message: "Hey! It's me. I didn't expect you to answer, but I hope everything is going well for you. Just calling to see how you're doing and all. Uh, give me a call back! Yeah...if you want. I hope everything is great! So, call me! Or...you know...(mumble) Yeah."
Possible Translation: My, it is so, so lonely in my bed. I occasionally take out that shirt you left behind that still smells like you. I may wear it around my apartment sometimes. I kept your toothbrush just in case. I think the cat is judging me.
So, do men come with built in radar that alerts them every time any of their exes suddenly become available? Is this a learned skill? HOW DO THEY KNOW? Because, wow, they certainly always seem to know in my life. As soon as one relationship gets booed off stage, there is always an ex tap dancing in the wings ready to give an encore performance.
Why do you contact your exes? What do your exes want when they contact you?
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1 comments:
Spot on. I'm clever enough to find ways to chase old-p*ssy (OP) without seeming like I am, but essentially you've hit the nail on the head.
Funny enough, there IS some sort of radar that goes off. And I've heard women wonder, "he quit being interested in me then, so why is he interested in me now?"
Well, the answer is simple. When he 'got' you the first time, you were new and exciting. That's the ultimate aphrodisiac. So when he hasn't seen you in a long time, you regain some of that "new-car" smell.
Plus, it's likely that the ground work has already been done (read: he's already banged you) so there's a higher probability of getting laid with little work.
Look, you don't have to like it, I'm just trying to do a service and lay out what is usually going on.
And, to be fair, women have a very similar setup they use for the same purpose. Life's weird, eh?
Caleb out.
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