Max Ehrmann Didn't Intend to Write Pickup Lines

Some guy sent me the entire text of the Desiderata on Ye Olde Dating Wesbite. That was it. Nothing else.

And what the fuck is that supposed to mean, exactly?

Baggage Magnet

Attention, Men of the World!

Are you carrying around so much emotional baggage, you'd get charged hundreds in fees by any airline? Do you have a hunchback from the sheer weight of all of the burden you're toting? For bonus points, do you have some kind of issues with your mother, or maybe a substance abuse problem?

If that sounds like you, try dating ME! Seriously! Lots of others like you have done so in the past and been quite happy about it, at least for a little while. The results are best if you 1) Keep your issues a secret or 2) Totally downplay their severity. Because once I realize the codependent mess we're about to be in, I'll probably wise up. But who knows, you might get lucky.

The universe, while spending lots of time sending the Queen some seriously effed-up e-mails, has also been working really hard to send me emotionally unavailable people. Several. In a row. And one question I have is: if you're in no shape to date, why are you on a dating website?

Fair question, I think.

Appropriations

Recently the Queen and I enjoyed a night on the town with my good friend T and his fairly-new girlfriend A. I've met A before and I think she's really cool. But what I hadn't notcied before were some subtle changes in T's wardrobe that were very clearly her influence- and frankly, the fact that we met them at a tiny bar to watch an unknown band is also very NOT T.

It got me thinking about when people get into relationships and they appropriate things from the other person- habits, lifestyles, wardrobe, preferences in music and TV and movies. I had a friend who, when she started dating her last boyfriend, suddenly loved punk bands and became a vegetarian. Neither of these were harmful to her, but I thought it was odd for her to make a change like giving up meat just because her boyfriend did.

I thought about myself and what I may have appropriated from people I've dated. Some things were only for the duration of the relationship, while others were things that I truly grew to like on my own (hello, Top Chef!).

What do you think, readers? What things have you picked up, or have people picked up from you? Have you ever made a drastic change because it made you match a partner's preferences? Have you ever been concerned when you've seen a friend do the same?